Engagement Ring Crisis

Remember this gorgeous ring the love of my life proposed to me with last summer? What a dreamy day that was. Unfortunately since then has been a downhill battle in the engagement ring world. This is a public cry for help, advice, or ideas since we have exhausted pretty much all other options and I have not worn a ring longer than I actually have during our engagement. 

I instantly was in love with the ring Jacob chose out. It was simple and perfect for my long skinny fingers (hello size 4.25). Although I teeny bit big it worked wonders and I wore it everyday after being proposed to without a problem.

Towards the end of September I began to notice the back of it developing some scuffs and marks. I assumed it simply needed a routine cleaning not realizing these marks were actually indents not just on the surface of the ring. After showing Jacob's parents and comparing his mom's ring to mine it was apparent this was not normal. They brought it into the jeweler for me, one that is well recognized and accredited, seeing what they could do.

The manager said she had never seen such a thing before yet assumed an easy rebuff and rhodium plating would do the trick (a common practice on white gold rings). I got my ring back a few weeks later and went back to wearing it like normal. Within a week I noticed a few scratches developing again on the back of the band.

Because I was becoming more self-aware (AKA paranoid) I continued to wear it and take note of how it changed over time. Slowly but surely it developed more and more scratches and dents all along the band, many of which resembled bite marks, I kid you not. With great frustration we brought it in again after only a few weeks of getting it back, still to the confusion of the manager.

At this point they foresaw three potential problems, 1. There was a defect in the ring 2. I was doing something to it 3. My body was having some sort of reaction to the metal and causing it.

They again took my original ring back and gave me another 14k white gold ring to test out. In theory this would have shown if it was me or a defect in my original ring. For six days I watched my every move with this new ring and racked my brain and the internet for answers. Once again the dents developed very quickly.

After a only week with scratch marks already being apparent, I documented the results and stopped wearing it in frustration. Take a look, I apologize there is a glare..
The third time we went back in it was pretty much decided for me that we would have to order my original ring in yellow gold. For a quick chemistry lesson, they thought that I was potentially having a reaction with the rhodium which makes white gold white. Ordering my ring in yellow gold would not include rhodium and have different compounds along with the gold (ex: copper).

For the past month and a half I have gone ring-less waiting for my new ring to be made and very excited about this problem being done and over with. I received my yellow gold ring last Friday and surprisingly like it even more than my original white gold ring. It is so beautiful! After less than six hours of wearing it however I begin to notice the tiniest of scratches again.

After an emotional break down (yes I will admit it) and increasing frustration over the lack of answers I have, we are completely lost. I have worn it for four days now and again it is developing dents like shown above.

I have had several people tell me it is probably something I am doing to it. As much as I would love to blame myself, it just doesn't make sense. I have a desk job, live an average life style, am not knocking my ring against anything, and cannot think of a single thing I would be doing.

What I especially don't understand is how millions of women wear theirs for decades and experience only subtle wear and tear, while I wear mine for six hours to a week and the back of it is completely destroyed. Even more confusing is that over the summer months after I got engaged I had a manual labor job of lifting, racking, and sending off canoes and kayaks into the lake and didn't experience any damage.

In the below picture you can see my 'tester' ring on the top all dented up and scratched, compared to my mom's wedding ring of 25 years right below it and other rings of mine.
Friends, I don't get it. I know I am likely overreacting and I apologize but at the same time Jacob and I both are extremely frustrated by the lack of answers and apparent oddity I am compared to every single other engaged and married woman who wears a ring and has never experienced such a thing.

Has anyone ever heard of such a thing? Do you have any suggestions? Could you ask around for us? We are completely dumbfounded and back to square one with our wedding being in four months-not fun. Thank you in advance, we greatly appreciate it!

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